Wednesday, April 20, 2016

THIS, I Know For Sure

Tonight our topic at our WINGS gathering is "THIS, I know for sure ... " I already had things that I wanted to share. This wasn't on the radar, but apparently it was meant to be. It is something that I truly believe and have fully known for a very long time.

I know that you will keep being presented with the same lesson until you learn it.

Sometimes the lesson is deep and it takes us awhile to even figure out we're supposed to be learning something. Sometimes it's ridiculously obvious.

Last year, after sixteen years of no issues, a raccoon got into my cabin and created havoc. The mess was disgusting and disheartening. I threw away the mattress and cushions and bedding and quilts. I scrubbed and disinfected every inch of the place. And I thought, 'I need to make sure I secure this place better in the fall.' 

I forgot. It never crossed my mind again.

I thought I noticed the other day that the door to the cabin was open. My eyes aren't that great anymore. The bridge to the cabin had once again floated away and getting there is do-able, just not as easy, so I chose to put it out of my mind.

No need to open the door to know there was trouble ... it was already open.

I made my way over there this weekend. I didn't even have to open the door to know there was trouble, because yes, the door WAS open. Both doors.

I wasn't even shocked or upset, just totally resigned to the fact that I am a fool. An 89 cent lock would have have totally avoided it.

This time he really did a number on it. He must have decided that he needed to ensure that the message sunk in this time. Why else would a creature go all around the perimeter of a building and rip out the insulation. It's not edible. It's not a nesting substance. Nothing smells good tucked inside it. The muddy clawing marks every two feet are very strange ... lots of them. Where was the mud coming from, you'd think his hands would have been clean by then. Very, very strange in a creepy sort of way.

I would have liked to observe his technique. Was he doing it from hanging on the edge and throwing it down? Probably not as the pictures weren't knocked off. But there's not enough room on the 4 inch ledge for a fat, old, lumbering coon and how could he get around the rafters? And how did he scale the wall to begin with?

I sure like to know what this was all about
He knocked down pretty well everything on the edge, smashing my flow blue plate and blue and white teapots. He broke the pitcher my sister made me in 1972 and destroyed the turquoise glass oil lamp that my mother gave me for a shower gift in 1974. It still had the cinnamon scented oil in it that took me back to the memories of our first apartment. 

So ... the lesson:
Remember stuff. Act on it. But remember that you don't remember very well anymore, so write it down. No ... better yet - DO IT NOW. Do it while it's fresh in your mind.

And believe me. It's fresh.
He forgot to toss down a couple pieces of insulation.
And muddy mess at equal intervals all around the perimeter... at the rafters, so how did he do that
This must have taken him awhile.  He pulled the eyes out of the poor bunny - that's wasn't cool.
Same deal as last year but added in the insulation for good measure.
The torquoise oil lamp from my mom.
Some nice china pieces for my glass cases.
That a lot of work for him and a lot of work for me.
Here we go again.
Everything out. And this time I get to scrub the walls.

Friday, January 1, 2016

Sweet Sixteen

I'm pumped! I can feel it ... this year is going to be a good one.

My word of the year is 'CREATE' ... CRE8 ... no negotiation. 
I am ready, willing and able. I'm hungry to get to it.

I did my usual 'review' of my goals for 2015 and I laughed out loud. Giving myself marks in each of the seven categories, I mostly got 0. I did get a 3/10 for writing. That was my word for last year and I felt pretty good about it. I only got 3 because I was very specific in what I wanted to achieve, like writing 50 blog posts. I did 9, the same as 2014. I couldn't even manage to up it by one. I could have given myself extra points for trying and actually doing ANYTHING compared to the others. The one that pulled the year out of the fire from being a total wash out was 'FINANCIAL' - I got 10/10. That is because I wrote: 'Oh hell. I give up.' 

This list is one that I actually have transferred year after year with very little editing or amendments to it. It should be entitled 'Things STILL Not Done'. Or 'What is the MATTER With You - Loser'. That's sort of how I feel every single year when I come to the realization that once again, I have not moved forward in the direction I expected myself to be going. 

This morning there was no 'boo-hoo, I-failed-miserably-I-have-to-do-better-next-year'. There was no great introspective examination of WHY I failed once again to accomplish these things that actually are pretty important to me and are actually very do-able. They are not over reaching and unattainable at all. 

I was working my way down the list ... Photos; Creativity; Business - etc.  Zero. Zero. Zero. One after another. The most pathetic showing yet. I was about to feel discouraged when I came to #7 and was able to give myself a 10. It out shone everything else. I AM a success! FINANCIAL: 'Oh hell. I give up.' I have. I did. I had totally forgotten that I wrote that. I know that I have felt that, I just didn't remember being so honest. 
Kind of proof that this year is going to be more colourful & creative.
  I was drawn to very vibrant and artful daily journals for 2016.
I always choose the same style for consistency, 
but these just jumped right into my hand.

I will do the list again this year. It's tradition. I will write down specific expectations again. I sort of need that. Although, considering that I actually don't act on one thing, a sane person would have to wonder why.

What is at the very top of my list this year, with great enthusiasm and joy rather than expectation, is my word 'CREATE'. This past year I did not get to my studio to work one single day. Not one. My studio is in my own house, just upstairs and I never showed up once. I missed it. I'm anxious to get back to it; to revive that very important part of my soul. I'm excited!

Sweet '16! The year is just hours old and I can already feel a turn towards the lighter, towards the joy of living an artful and creative life.